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For Bobby: When It Rains, It Pours On Your Vice-Presidential Dreams

From Esquire Magazine’s Pierce On Politics Blog

As the most recent bless’d Republican savior (David Frum fluffs the living shit out of the Jindal-for-VP-Will-Save-Mittens bandwagon here, calling ole Bobby “a brilliant policy mind with an inspirational life story who has run an effective government in corruption-tainted Louisiana.“), Bobby Jindal must be wetting his kids-size pants. National pundits all over the conservative spectrum (which spans a very acute wavelength) have been cheer-leading for Jindal as either a.) Mitt Romney’s very best awesome choice for Vice President – job that “isn’t worth a bucket of warm spit,” or b.) as a upstart, GOP convention coup d’tat replacement for the savagely emasculated Mittens Romney on the top of the ticket.

Sadly, for those of us who actually live in the state that Jindal “governs,” it seems like the gold standard has truly worn off:

The Jindal administration has certainly been very good for Bobby Jindal, but it hasn’t been so great for, you know, the rest of us Louisianians.

1. “Louisiana Last in ‘Camelot’ Index”

What does that mean exactly? No King Arthurs? No, something more damning:

Louisiana ranks dead last on a new composite index comparing how the fifty states fare on measures of economic vitality, education, health, crime and governance. The “Camelot Index” is issued annually by Federal Funds Information for States, a non-partisan subscription service created by the National Governors Association and the National Conference of State Legislatures, which tracks and reports on the fiscal impact of federal budget and policy decisions on state budgets and programs.

…The Camelot Index brings together measures of economic vitality, health, education, crime, society and government. In the current index, many states rank consistently across measures, while others do quite well on some measures but not on others. “Overall for 2012, Louisiana ranks as Camelot-Not, with the report noting that, “Nevada and South Carolina move out of the bottom ranking from 2011, replaced this year by Louisiana. Seven of the Index’s 10 bottom-ranking states are from the South.”

While Gov. Bobby Jindal has foresworn any interest in being Mitt Romney’s running-mate, the Camelot ranking comes at an inopportune moment if he harbors any such ambition. The governor’s stewardship of Louisiana has won rave reviews in the conservative press, but the FFIS ranking would seem to indicate that Louisiana has a long way to go.

Even the Jindal “economic miracle” is slammed in the report:

The Camelot Index’s “healthy economy” ranking is based on the percentage of people in poverty, employment growth, population growth, per capita income growth, per capita federal tax liabilities — a reflection of high incomes — per capita taxable resources and the annual mean wage for retail salespeople. Combining these criteria, New Jersey ranked number one, followed by North Dakota, Wyoming, Maryland and Virginia. Louisiana placed 41st. Mississippi and Alabama were at the bottom.

Oh, I guess “Believing” in Louisiana just isn’t enough. Government by a hope and a prayer certainly isn’t working out for old Bobby.

2. Louisiana Most Violent State in the U.S.

Another wonderful reflection of the state of our state under Bobby Jindal was released this past week, and it’s a doozy:

According to a recent report from the Institute for Economics and Peace, Louisiana was ranked America’s most violent state for the 20th year in a row, based on homicide, violent crime and incarceration rates, as well availability of firearms.

“…What the [report] shows is that over the past 20 years, America has become substantially more peaceful, witnessing a significant and sustained reduction in direct violence,” said IEP founder and executive chairman Steve Killelea in a release.”Homicide rates in the U.S. have halved since 1991 and the violent crime rate has also fallen by nearly half during the same period.”

America becomes more peaceful, while Louisiana brings up the rear. Can’t even say “why Louisiana ain’t Mississippi” on this one, huh Jay Dardenne?

He’s done such a great job here, why not just make give him a promotion!


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